A Butcher's Guide to Inner Peace: A Bizarro Horror Comedy Novel

A breathing corpse in the bathtub is a terrible start to the weekend. The cotton-candy subway to hell is much, much worse.Jessica just wants to survive her massive hangover. But after fleeing her trashed apartment, she is suddenly dragged into a subterranean labyrinth of blood, shifting realities, and homicidal balloon-clowns. Trapped in a grotesque fever dream where the laws of physics have completely collapsed, her only companion is a cynical, multi-eyed parasite perched on her shoulder, treating her brutal suffering like a bad sitcom. She doesn't know how she got here, but she knows one thing: she is going to fight her way out.Thousands of miles away, under the warm sun of rural Portugal, Joaquim is living the dream. An off-grid life, baking fresh bread, smoking homegrown weed, and crafting macabre art out of scavenged animal skulls. Alongside the love of his life, his days are a flawless, quiet paradise of absolute peace. It is the perfect, idyllic existence.But the walls of reality are much thinner than they appear.Two completely separate worlds—one a blood-soaked, absurdist nightmare, the other a sun-drenched utopia—are on a collision course. And when the boundaries finally break, there is no going back.A brutal, hilarious, and deeply emotional collision of genres. Fans of the raw psychological edge of Chuck Palahniuk, the completely unhinged Bizarro-Fiction of Carlton Mellick III, and the cosmic hilarity of Jason Pargin (John Dies at the End) will be completely consumed by this transgressive wild ride. Read more